Different Ways to Snag Yur Man

We all k now that the big problem facing today's youth is how tur snag thur man. Why, just the other day I was talking to a yuth that I met on the roard, there in the middle of the city and they were riding their bicycle and wanderin about their mommy. And I say, hey what's yur wrong? And they said "how to snag mur man"

And so I gavem the followin advice.

1. Cookem a nce big dins

2. Evurr Day, in yur house madea cookies.

3. Bakem in a pie!

4. Eat the bie.

What I Love About Computers

You can do so many things with computers that you can't do without them!

For example:

1. Write your papers

2. Go to the mall

3. Watch some tube

4. Watcha facebook

5. Shop!!

6. Getchurself some nice things!

Things My Mother Would Have Said at the Big Bang Had She and I Both Been at the Big Bang (hi mommy!)

Eat something, you're too skinny. Especially when compared to this Bang, which is very Big.

The Bang is too loud, it hurts my ears.

When are you going to give me grandchildren? This Big Bang is alright, I guess.

I got Jacob Cohen's email address from his mother. He's such a nice boy, you should email him after the Big Bang!! I wish I understood email.

So what if Amanda's mom is paying for her to spend Spring Break in Cancun? If everyone decided to build a Space-Bridge during the Big Bang and then decided to jump off that Space-Bridge, would you jump off the Space-Bridge, too?

I want hundreds of Space-grandchildren.

You can never find good Delis out here.